Numerically, one represents the least amount of everything. Economically, one can be associated with poverty or absolute scarcity of resources. In fact, even in linguistics, one cannot share a table with those words which occupy position in the comparative and superlative degree. One can be equated with such words as meagre, few, minute, negligible etc.
But I have been compelled that one can sometimes be too much and overwhelming. One can be too much to handle sometimes. One can mean complete irrevocable destruction. One can mean that you will not be able to fix it again. One can mean that all the bitter tears and heartaches will be in vain. You can’t treat one as inconsequential with safety all the time. Sometimes it can be a fatal blow that will leave you sempiternally bedridden and irreversible in consequences. One can be very risky to tamper with.
Look at families today. There are people trying to run more than one family at the same time. Maritally non-committal individuals seem to be so evenly distributed that you can meet a sample of these tares daily without having a sample redundancy. Men are mostly affected in this respect. The temptation that the grass is greener across the fence seems to be men’s sure pitfall trap. So you will find a family man is caring for another woman somewhere and taking care of bills, but he is already overwhelmed with his own responsibilities. Maybe these men are trying to compete with our forefathers who had polygamous marriages. But they forgot to take the script of handling it.
I once had an honest conversation with someone I trust concerning matters of family, and I got an impression that I would like to share with you people. This is what I got; that one family is too much, and you don’t need another one.
I immediately refuted this and said, “what if I earn a six-figure salary and the first digit is more than seven?” Seemingly I had nailed it. But he educated me. Now before I share the lesson with you, I don’t want you to imagine that I hold an opinion favouring double standards in matrimonial issues. I have learnt the art of questioning as a tool of getting information from others.
So this gentleman reminded me of a truth that I will never forget. So he said, “Listen my young friend, most men have made this mistake, but you should be safe from it because you have had a conversation with me. Families are not raised with finances only. Families need quality time, undivided attention and love. You can clear tuition fees, clear the mortgage, and meet all the bills, but you cannot hire a husband and father to your family. Even if you were to be elected to be the president today, to your family you’re a daddy and a hubby, and these duties cannot be delegated. Your children need to ask you all the questions they have. They need to hear the stories of your childhood and how you met some of the challenges they may be facing now. One family is too much. Don’t add the burden of handling another family incognito.”
This is a counsel I cannot dare question. I have it enlisted in the golden tips and I will always share it with all the men who have time to listen. If you have enough money, this is no proof that you are ready to stand as the Head of a family. There are issues, in fact a lot of them, that don’t need financial solutions and they are such that they cannot be delegated. If you are ready for this, then go ahead. One family is too much!
Families have taken a lot of space because families have a special place in my heart. I believe that if our families are well organized, then a lot of the problems of this world may be reduced by more than 50%.
So the message here is that one can be too much.
Go to the rehabilitation centers today and inquire from those poor inmates. You will hear that it was just a single puff that hacked their strongholds and left them helpless. Ask a man locked under the marauding and dictatorial chain of porn addiction, it will be that a single link or one time exposure has replicated to a billion hours of sensual exposure. What about the corrupt leaders? One successful loot has paved the way for the mess and leakages reported by the national exchequer. What about one careless sexual contact? I read of a very nice person, who got exposed to unprotected sex once and it resulted in pleasure, pregnancy, and a horst of STDs. One proved too much.
One can be too much. There are some things you shouldn’t do once. A single step in the wrong direction is too costly and you have enough examples to prove this statement true. A lot of people, promising in ideas, aptitude, and attitude, have failed to jump to their potential because one wrong attempt proved too much.
We must guard well how we get exposed to the things we take as simple things. Most of these small things have eternal consequences and we cannot vilify their effects in our lives. A tot of poison can make an irreversible impression in our ability to synthesise oxygen. One may be too little if you count it numerically, or when assigning ranks. But this gives no moral ground to take is negligible in consequence. Many people have suffered, because of one time misguided exposure. The news tells it all. The sincere inmates can share with you their stories…
Maybe King Solomon said it well after his lots of bittersweet experience and life exposure:
Dead flies cause the ointment of the apothecary to send forth a stinking savour: so doth a little folly him that is in reputation for wisdom and honour.—King Solomon ( 970-931 BCE)